This morning I got up to log onto work for the day, and I noticed an anomaly that I haven’t seen in these parts in a long time. SNOW. Now sadly, I didn’t get a chance to take a picture, because quite honestly, my brain was not at normal functioning levels for me to even think to do that. For the last 2 ½ years, my wake up call was between 9-9:15AM. Now, it’s 7:30AM. That 90 minute difference is a bit much for this soon-to-be 47 year old. Hopefully after a few months of this new schedule, I will be more cognizant in the morning.
Winter has finally arrived here in Southeast Pennsylvania
We haven’t seen snow in my town in a couple years. Call it climate change, call it global warming. But the last couple years, snow has been almost non-existent in my part of the world. And for someone that has had some serious difficulty with snow/cold temperatures in general, I’ve been completely A-OK with this. Yet, if this year has taught me anything, it’s to appreciate the present and stop thinking/worrying about the future.
Honestly I cannot even believe I’m saying that! If anyone knows me, you know that Winter is extremely difficult for me. My Seasonal Depression (also known as SAD), is usually over the roof between now and Mid-March. My energy levels plummet, my motivation is practically non-existent. And yet, 2020 showed me that it is NOT worth it! The warrior in me wants to fight this. Until I get to my Heavenly home, I need to understand that where I am living at right now, I need to deal with the good AND the bad. So I need to make the most of the time I have here.
Lately I’ve been watching a lot of documentaries about my ancestors from Ireland, Scotland and Scandinavia. I’m a Scotch-Irish Viking, dangit! And let me tell you, they did some really cool stuff back in the day when it came to Winter. Without getting in all the magical properties of their culture (I cannot go down that rabbit hole for personal reasons), I’ve been mainly watching the culinary and domesticated ways my ancestors handled the cold. Especially in that part of the world, there are areas that sees the sun rise and set and only a few hours from each other. Darkness for most of the year sounds incredibly upsetting to me. But I like to think of myself as a domesticated pet who has NO idea how my feral brethren did it for as long as they did. In many ways, the Industrial Revolution made many of us lazy. As easy as it is to switch on a light, or turn on a fireplace heater, I can easily say 90% of this population would die in the event of an EMP disaster.
How much would I love to have a wood burning stove in my house, as well as a window in my kitchen, part of my deck covered, and a cobb stove outside? These are things on my wish list, and until then, I need to work with what I have. We are planning on staying here for a while, and until then, we might as well really get into the nesting process that I ignored when I moved in here 5 years ago. The moment cold weather hits, I retreat into my own depression, and it’s really easy to just stay there. This year, I am going to press on through that and force the change that needs to be made. There’s a big difference in hibernating during winter and retreating. In my eyes, when you retreat, you walk away, you surrender. When you hibernate, you go into quiet mode for a temporary amount of time. Retreating is permanent, whereas hibernating is temporary.
So, this year, I’m going to hibernate.
Taking from my Scandinavian ancestors, I turn to the old tradition of Hygge. (pronounced Hoo-Ga). It is the tradition of nesting, getting cozy, hibernating. There are amazing YouTube videos that talk about Hygge and what it entails. SLOW AND SIMPLE LIVING. If you want to understand my need for slow and simple living, go check out my blog post here.
The Lord created this world for a reason. There’s a reason why we are born to a certain country, race, culture, climate, etc. I have spent countless years trying to get away from a season that I never really got to understand. Why would God have me live in the North if I’m not supposed to enjoy it? There’s no doubt I LOVE the change of the seasons. Even Autumn into Winter, there is a small period where my body, mind and soul enjoy the change. But it’s a very short time, and I spiral quickly afterwards. So, how does one try to keep the joy for that entire season, like I do the other three?
This is my quest.
Now that I am working from home, I have the ability to nest a bit more. Before, I was out of the house somewhere between 6:30AM and 9PM, depending on where I was working. No more! Linus is quite happy that Mama is home every day, and if a puppy’s love is not motivation enough, I’m in big trouble!
How do you hibernate in the Winter? I’m legitimately curious. This is a big challenge for me, so any advice would be truly appreciative!
This simple word means different things to many people. Some
see physical locations, other see people. But for those in the Body of Christ,
Yeshua Messiah, Home is as simple as American Apple Pie. We don’t need any
fancy adjectives or words to describe what Home means. It’s just simple.
Many Christian songs describe Home in the eyes of the writer. And although our descriptions may differ, the end result is the same: To live in eternity with our King, our Savior. Yesterday my church sang Chris Tomlin’s “Home”, and earlier in the week, I was listening to Mercy Me’s “I Can Only Imagine”. Those are just two small descriptions of what Home in Heaven COULD be like. Truth be told, there isn’t a single thing on this planet that can truly describe the awesomeness of what Heaven is like.
But it’s sure dang fun to think about!
I may have tapped into Heaven in previous blogs, but as I
get older and closer to the day when my earthly life is complete, I can’t help
but imagine what my eternal life will look like. I’ve read books by Kat Kerr,
Mary Catherine Baxter to name just a couple, and my imagination just blossoms
into this never-ending dream of life with my Creator.
From the streets of gold, to the Throne Room, the Court Rooms of Heaven, the storehouses, the Hall of Tears, heck the Lamb’s Book of Life itself…it’s HOME. And I want to share with you my personal prophetic dreams I have during my sleep, as well as blurbs throughout the day that the Father gives me.
Now, some people like Kat Kerr bring up places in Heaven that aren’t biblical, but I have learned that our Father in Heaven is so Almighty, that to judge a person’s perspective on Heaven is just not worth doing. Who am I to judge what someone believes to be a prophetic vision of their Home with God? Now, I personally believe that the Bible is the inspired Word of God and therefore what’s in the Bible is Truth. But to limit the Almighty Savior to this beautiful little Book is just silliness. So, let’s delve into what the Heavenly Father has shown me:
(Left: According to Biblical measurements, the size of Heaven would literally span almost the entire United States. Right: What the Three Heavens look like according to the Bible)
It’s important to say that the boundaries of Heaven are indeed protected by the most beautiful layers of jewels you’ve ever seen. Each gate being a single pearl, they are surrounded by 12 layers of gemstones no Universe could come close to the beauty and strength they have. Angels stand guard at each gate, allowing only those who are worthy and stainless to enter.
When you enter, you are surrounded by parks and vistas too far for our earthly eyes to comprehend. With the flowers and blades of grass humming praises to God, the aromas surrounding you make Viktor and Rolf’s Flower Bomb perfume seem ordinary. The streets you walk on are literally golden, yet transparent, far as the eyes can see. The sky above you is the clearest blue you can see, yet, near the horizon, are majestic purples and pinks and yellows, not sure if you are looking at a sunrise or sunset. But there is no nighttime. The closest you can get to the skies darkening is when you are in the heavenly woodlands, thick and lush with oaks, maples, willows, ash…every tree imaginable.
Downtown Heaven is like a city, with tall, crystallized buildings, sending off prism waves of light that literally pulse with energy from the praises in the air. As if the very air in Heaven is worshiping. Inside each building are homes and businesses where people who mastered their arts and crafts on Earth could continue what they loved doing. At the end of the main city street is the Throne Room. The closer you get to the Thone Room, the heavier your chest feels, because the Glory that is our God is so powerful, that the only thing that could handle it is our eternal bodies. Our earthly fleshy bodies would not be able to withstand the awesomeness that is His Glory. In front of the Throne Room is the River of Life, literally flowing within the building itself. At the center of the River, right smack in front of the doorway of the Throne Room, is the Tree of Life. A different fruit grows every month, and the fruit AND leaves on the tree have heavenly healing powers. As you go up the steps into the Throne Room, you will encounter Men, Lions, Lambs, Horses, Eagles, and Angels with eyes all over their wings. They part in two to allow you into the building, where all your family and friends, loved ones, acquaintances, really anyone who wants to be there, to greet you, as you enter and walk down the aisle, where your Bridegroom Jesus, our Yeshua Messiah, is waiting for you, smiling and ridiculously happy to see you. Clouds billowing at the bottom of the steps lead you up to the Father, who sits on the Throne waiting for you. Jesus takes your hand and walks up with you, His bride, to present to His Father. This is where your get your crowns and your robes of Salvation and any other rewards for your works during your earthly life. Once you embrace the Father for your return Home to the Kingdom, Jesus turns you around to present you to the Heavenly people. It is a massive homecoming, and the day is all about you. This is the part where you will finally be reunited with your family, friends and loved ones. This includes any children who passed before their own earthly birth. Many of these children will still be infants and toddlers, as the growth rate in Heaven is incredibly slow, for the sole purpose of being able to raise them.
There will be a feast for you, provided by Yeshua, because it is your wedding day, and you are home in Heaven. Multitudes of people will be present, and you will be able to remember all those you met during your earthly life.
Once your feast is over, you will be brought to your Heavenly property and be given the official tour. The great thing about where you live is that you will be living amongst those you were closest to on Earth. All your friends, family, loved ones, people you called your “inner circle” will be living around you. Mind you, it sounds unreasonable, because there are just millions and millions of people out there. However, because Heaven is Omnipresent, there are things our Earthly minds cannot understand. Like dimensions. Imagine your heavenly inner circle is like a multidimensional cube. You may be only able to physically see one dimension, but through thought you are able to travel to dimensions where your property is part of, where others live. I understand it may be hard to comprehend but remember this is God we are talking about. Quantum Physics cannot even apply here, as that’s just child’s play to what Heaven is like.
Now, for me, I want to tell you about my personal property. This vision has been coming to me for a long time now, and although I have no idea if this is truth or not, I have faith that God is showing me what I am building up there. Because that is what we are doing here. Works do NOT guarantee our salvation, no, only belief that Jesus Christ is our Lord and Savior, who died for our sins, who gave His life to destroy the penalty of sin (death), we also know that faith without works is dead. So, although our faith gets us inside Heaven, our works are what build the place where we will call home in Heaven. I was shown what used to be a small shack of a house that I had been building, because even though I was doing so many good works in my life, my lack of faith in Jesus thwarted it’s building. I’m grateful to say that coming back to Him has assured me that my soul will be in everlasting bliss with my King. And I am building a palace! Why? Because I will be ruling with my King! That’s what we are called to do! So, our Lord WANTS us to have majestic palaces. We were not born to live in sadness and unfulfilled servitude. He created us to rule along side with Him! In all HIS GLORY! We have made ourselves believe in this notion that we cannot feel happy when good things happen to us, thus allowing negative ideas and events to be put in our world, forcing us to believe we deserved these bad things, linking them to “life lessons”. Sure, our God is a Mighty and Just God, but if you think for one moment God put you on Earth for the sole purpose to suffer, you really don’t know Him.
Suffering comes from the enemy and the enemy alone. Does God allow suffering to happen? Well, yes, of course…. we are living in Satan’s world, you know…the Earth is Satan’s domain. Just as God allowed Satan to put Job through suffering, we too, are given trials and tribulations. It is through faith, prayer and commanding the authority through our Almighty where we can defeat the enemy! Otherwise, the suffering will continue to happen. So, think about that before blaming God for your troubles.
I digress, back to Heaven!
My property has a bit of everything on it. But, most of what lives there are animals. I asked God years ago that any neglected animal, domestic or wild, be put onto my property to live eternal happiness. So, it’s a bit of an animal sanctuary, with rolling hills, a mountain range, woodlands and meadows. The valley of my home is an eternal Springtime, however the closer you get to the mountain range the seasons change to Autumn. The people that live around me live in a village-like setting…like the Shire meets a rural Scottish village. There is a lot of farming that goes on there, with lakes and ponds in different areas. The majority of the trees on my property are different types of Willow, my favorite tree species. In another dimension of my property is a tropical area where the leaves are as thick as the humidity. Clear blue waterfalls and tropical life live here, that connects to the Crystal Sea. I do not have Winter on my property. Although many residents of Heaven have Winter on their property, it’s just not my cup of tea.
Some of the structures in Heaven are for specific purposes. There’s the Storehouse, where body parts, both internal and external parts, sit and wait for their purpose to be fulfilled. Whenever you hear of a miracle, the Storehouse is usually involved.
There’s the Hall of Tears, where every teardrop fallen from
every human ever lived on Earth resides. Each tear is documented. When you hear
of God wiping away your tears, this is precisely where He puts them.
The Great Library is one of the largest buildings in Heaven (not including the Throne Room). Although the Lamb’s Book of Life resides in the Throne Room next to the Father, our personal Book of Life sits in this library. If you’ve ever seen the Citadel on Game of Thrones, know this is just a modicum of what the Great Library looks like. Every wholesome book as well as documents from everyone’s lives and events on Earth are shelved somewhere in this library. Scrolls, leaflets, even tiny notes on napkins are stored here.
There is such a thing as the Portal, that Kat Kerr discusses in her books. I have seen it. It is a place where people can come and see events unfold on Earth. Many Heavenly residents use the Portal for the purpose of watching their loved ones on Earth get saved/baptized, be born or even as they are leaving their earthly life.
The Sea of Eternity or the Crystal Sea as some call it, is the vast ocean around Heaven. The entire Sea is lined with crystals and gemstones from all over the Universe. Some that are not even of Earth. It is clear as glass, and sparkles like prisms in the sunlight. I have seen people that go there as if they were to go to any beach. Only they are in their heavenly clothes rather than bathing suits. Our heavenly clothes are usually long flowy dresses or skirts, long flowy tops, all different pastels, whites, ivory, etc…Here’s where it gets weird: Sure, you can go into the sea, you can even go into the River of Life. It’s wet, as you know, but you WON’T get wet. Wrap your head around that, now!
One of the most beautiful parts of Heaven are all around within the small parks. Gardens and small meadows, coves, etc., where you can go and be quiet, seem to be infinitely around. You even have a private garden on your property where you and Jesus hang out. Because Yeshua is Omnipresent, He can be in multiple places at the same time. So, when you are in Heaven, when you want to be near Him, it happens almost instantly! My private gardens are filled with pink and lavender roses, so thick it’s almost soundproof. My garden backs up to a covered porch on one side of my home. This is where I have had visions of having tea with not only my King, but I have had dreams of being there with my Mom. (who is still thankfully living here on earth!) Having these visions give me hope and utter happiness that this is what awaits me.
There are ALWAYS parties going on! From as small as private
picnics to massive feasts, people go from home to home, community to community,
to stay with loved ones. Because time does not exist in Heaven, it really is
impossible to comprehend how things go on up there. Parties can sometimes last
days, if not weeks, before things settle down and move onto the next place. Many
of the parties are continuing celebrations of homecomings that are hosted by
your loved one.
Now, although I have not seen in my visions other places that other people have seen, that doesn’t mean they don’t exist. Heaven is infinite; and right now, this is all that God has shown me.
I pray this gives you peace and yet a sense of urgency. The King is coming, everyone. This is eternity we are talking about. You must ask yourself: Are you so rooted in the Earth that eternity is nothing but a fleeting thought? Do not have that backwards way of thinking, loved ones. I have seen things, been blessed with things given to me I wish I could explain more than I have here. Our life here on Earth, albeit important, is the “fleeting thought” when it comes to the scope of eternity. This life here? This is just a blip. Eternity, however, well…I do not need to give an explanation on how long eternity is. You have the choice to decide where you want eternity. I pray you will be blessed in reading this. I pray seeds have been planted in your heart. For I would love nothing more than to spend eternity with you all. God Bless.
I have so many flipping blog posts that are in the presence of being written, but this never ending brain of mine refuses to turn off, which puts me in a situation where I am writing several posts simultaneously.
Over the last few weeks, I have noticed the talk of the great Rapture of the church has increased. Constant chatter about dates, moons, feasts and such, and watching/listening to brothers and sisters try to figure out when the Bride of Christ is going home. It makes me concerned, because we are not to know the actual time it’s supposed to happen. In scripture, where it talks about coming like a “thief in the night”, and that we are not to know the day or the hour of the Lord’s coming, it is actually NOTtalking about the Rapture; it’s really talking about the second coming of Christ. I truly believe that we should be watchful/mindful of the fact Yeshua IS coming back and we, the Bride of Christ, will be joining Him in the air as we head for the Marriage Supper of the Lamb. However, we should not be focusing on WHEN; when we should be ministering and witnessing to those who have not been saved by the grace of our Lord yet.
Do not get me wrong, I love to talk about the upcoming Rapture. I personally do not care if we are Pre, Mid or Post Tribulation; and I wish my fellow brothers and sisters would understand and take heed on that. Are we living in end times? You bet we are! The Bible clearly states this and what we need to look for. Earthquakes, Volcanic Eruptions, Tidal Waves, Hurricanes, Wildfires, and an all-around lack for the Lord are true and legitimate signs that we are at the end of our days here on Earth. I don’t even need to go into the biblical prophecies that have been already fulfilled over the last century. But does Abba show us in the Bible WHEN He will catch us up to Heaven? As in timing? Well, that’s still up for debate. We tend to forget time does not exist in eternity. But I do believe Abba gave us clues within scripture to help us look for the actual season of the Rapture. Although many brothers and sisters still use chapters and verses in the Bible that are specifically about Jesus’ second coming, and relay them as passages about the Rapture, it’s really not far off from the Truth, which is we really have no idea when this will happen. Yet, when you look into some of the books of the Bible while verifying events that are happening on earth, one can surely see certain areas of life as we know it. We can easily come to a simple conclusion that all these events in scripture have led us to this present day knowledge that something is stirring in the air. Let’s take a look at some of those passages: Revelation 3:10
“Since you have kept My command to endure patiently, I will also keep you from the hour of trial that is going to come on the whole world to test the inhabitants of the earth.”
“But our citizenship is in Heaven, and we eagerly await a Savior from there, the Lord Jesus Christ, who, by the power that enables Him to bring everything under His control, will transform our lowly bodies so that they will be like His glorified body.”
“He said to them, ‘ It is not for you to know the times or dates the Father has set by His own authority. But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes on you; and you will be my witnesses in Jerusalem, and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the ends .of the earth.'”
Luke 17: 34-37
“I tell you, on that night two people will be in one bed; one will be taken and the other left. Two women will be grinding grain together; one will be taken and the other left.” “Where, Lord?” they asked. He replied, “Where there is a dead body, there the vultures will gather.”
These are the very Bible passages that <to me> are about the Rapture. All other passages are <again, to me> about the Second Coming of our Lord Yeshua, the Messiah, the Christ.
Now that we got that out of the way, I’m sure you’re asking, “What in Sam Hill does this have to do with Death and the Changing of the Seasons?” Keep up with me, baby birds, I promise to feed you.
We are heading into the darker part of the year. With that comes some beautiful biblical feasts like the Feasts of Trumpets, Feast of Tabernacles, Yom Kipper and more. This is the time of year when we find ourselves digging a little deeper into the soul, trying to understand purpose. I happen to love this time of year, the world becomes another Spring, where the leaves become the flowers. The smell of campfires to keep warm, hearty stews and soups to keep us nourished, fuzzy socks and blankets, and deeper conversations with the company you keep. For me, that’s perfection, until the end of December when everything becomes truly dead in this part of the world, and where many people start feeling the affects of Seasonal Affective Depression (SAD). In many earlier posts here on my blog, I talk about this disorder quite extensively, because I have suffered from it for decades. But it got me thinking: Am I getting depressed because my flesh is telling me to be depressed? Or is it my soul? Well, my soul belongs to Christ Yeshua, and therefore no stain must be on it. This includes any type of negativity. Now, before anyone gets on their high horse and starts criticizing me, allow me to continue. I am NOT, I repeat, I am NOT saying that depression is a sin. I am not saying anxiety or any other disorder of the mind is sin. Maybe it is, and maybe it isn’t. Sin comes in many forms, whether it be self-inflicted, generational, ancestral, etc…Since I am not God, I really can’t answer that. What I AM saying is, is that we CHOOSE to continue down that path of depression, without trying to find ways to rid of it. Many people assume that since they have it, they just need to either a) put a band-aid on it with medicine or material goods, or b) just deal with it. Sure, those are fine and all, but there is more! If we feel deep down, depressed, anxious, angry, hurt…why are we not speaking to Abba about this? Why are we just throwing our hands up in the air and saying, “Welp! That time of year has come! Time to get the sun lamp out!” Or “Time to buy extra tissues cause there’s gonna be a lot of crying!” What ever happened to ” Lord, deliver me from the sadness that I am going through. If it is in Your will, please remove the pain I have at this time every year. And if it not in Your will, please fill me up with your wisdom, gladness and joy, so that I may rejoice in You, Lord, in knowing praises to You will relieve me from this torment.”
We are so CONSUMED by our own wants and needs, we completely miss the boat on what the Father wants us to do! This is why leading a life dedicated to Christ Yeshua Messiah is one of the hardest walks of anyone’s life. Yet it can be done! It’s just literally a matter of whether we choose to walk it. And I mean TRULY WALK IT.
When you become saved, you learn that certain things that were once part of you are no longer a burden or necessity. That certainly doesn’t mean that everything negative in our life will go away. But with a great amount of will, along with certain understandings that no longer prove valid, we CAN get past the worldly burdens. The enemy burns into our brains that in order to survive on this earth, we have to endure these standards of living. Nope, not even close. If you have Abba in your heart, live by grace and follow His commands, rest assured that reward He talks about will be great when we leave this earth.
For me? That burden was death.
Am I afraid of death? Not like I used to be. Sometimes I would think about death so much I wouldn’t sleep for days. When someone I love passes away, I always had this feeling of utter sadness that I will never see them again, talk to them again, embrace them again. And when you allow your physical human nature to take over your soul, well then, yeah, you’re going to feel those deep feelings of detachment. I can honestly say I have been blessed with this notion that God loves us SO much, He will NEVER put us in a situation where the end result would be so traumatically negative, we couldn’t recover. When you allow God to take over in your life, you learn these valuable lessons of refinement and continue to walk in His footsteps. I get this now. And I know that whether I am raptured in this life, or pass away before it actually happens, I know deep down I will not only be reunited with my Beloved Yeshua, but with those who left this planet before me.
Christ is coming.
There is NO time to say, “I’ll prepare tomorrow” or “When I get a chance I’ll do it”…because all it takes is one second. One second…for life as we know it to change. Thousands, if millions, WILL disappear. Chaos and despair will cover the earth. What side of that coin do you want to be on?
My dreams lately have been reflecting the possibility that the heavens are moving and shaking things up. Everything going on in the news from peace talks and earthquakes clearly show something big is about to happen.
So many people don’t believe me when I say this. So many say that this is all bogus, that it will never happen.
So many people also believed that terrorists would never attack our soil.
And yet, 9/11 happened.
Christ is coming, brothers and sisters. The Marriage Supper of the Lamb is getting ready. The invitations have been sent out. Respond yes. Be prepared. We are in the season of the great catching away. Do you want to go home to paradise? Or would you rather wait and see what happens?
It’s been over 3 months since this new chapter unfolded before me. And I have to tell you, it’s been pretty amazing. Well, it would probably be more amazing without the Arctic freeze and snow every few days, but I also know it could be worse. Every so often during these 2 months, temperatures having been swinging around in the 40’s and 50’s, so the temperatures will alert the sleeping flowers and trees that dawn is approaching for their big wake-up call. And then we get snow. Or a day where its 10 degrees fahrenheit. Another month or so, and we will start seeing some buds on the trees, and maybe a crocus or two!
But I digress…I wanted to get online and talk about a piece of scripture that came across my eyes today. Numbers 11:5
I immediately thought of my friend Chad, who after telling him I started reading the Bible, he said jokingly, “Let me know when you get to Numbers. ” I have to admit, I have avoided Numbers like the plague for that very reason!
But, Jesus has other plans for me, I guess.
Anyway, I was listening to this prophetic word on YouTube one morning, when this passage was brought up. I decided to look it up, and literally sat here at my desk, completely clueless as to what it meant. I decided to reach out to a fellow Brother in Christ/Bible Study Teacher/Good Friend and Partner of my BFF haha… (yeah, he has lots of titles), and he gave me a brief albeit solid explanation to the passage.
“In context it was the Jewish people wandering in the desert whining about how good they had it when they were slaves. Their eyes were off the blessings of the Lord providing daily manna, they were lusting for the “good ole days…”
WOW. For an instant I got it. I understood what the Israelite’s were complaining about. I understand it, because I felt that way through my first marriage, and my last place of employment. Even if life was hell, it was stable. It was something that I knew, and no matter how bad it got, at least I knew what to expect, rather than having not a clue of what’s happening. It’s why I don’t like surprises. It’s why I tend to know exactly what my step-son is going to say/do before it happens. My need to know everything around me consumed my life. I had to be in the know with everything and complained when I didn’t know what was going on. Right now, I am going through that, but, I decided last month to take up the Cross and allow God to do with me as He saw fit. And my life has been nothing short of a miracle. Since 2004, I have been longing to be back home, and after 13 years, here I am. Don’t get me wrong, I am still diligently looking for a job, but I also know God knows my heart and knows exactly where I will thrive. So, following in His footsteps rather than my own is definitely humbling and very difficult. I’ve never been a patient person, and living on a daily instant gratification for things has created something within me I am not proud of. Getting back to basics and bringing myself back into Spirit, well, I can easily say it’s not easy. Yet the infinite patience of our Father is astounding, and no one should really question that. It’s very difficult to not look on the outward appearance of things and instead look within. But looking within is where the real treasure is. Seeing the very thing that God created us in the first place for, that is where the miracles sit. How many in this world have been honestly able to see that? I’m 44 years old, and seeing this through my child-like eyes is like looking upon a unicorn – you can’t believe it’s real but there it is standing in front of you.
Sometimes, God allows difficult times to happen in order for the amazing things to take place. I think I may have mentioned this in my last post. And most likely, I will mention it in the next one. I think it’s important to remember that. We are so caught up our egocentric minds, that there isn’t any room for God. In order for us to truly allow God into our lives and hearts, we must let go of our worldly desires.
It’s not easy. But think of the Parable of the rich man who wanted to enter the Kingdom of Heaven….Incidentally enough, it’s the next verses in Matthew Chapter 10:
17 And when he was gone forth into the way, there came one running, and kneeled to him, and asked him, Good Master, what shall I do that I may inherit eternal life?
18 And Jesus said unto him, Why callest thou me good? there is none good but one, that is, God.
19 Thou knowest the commandments, Do not commit adultery, Do not kill, Do not steal, Do not bear false witness, Defraud not, Honour thy father and mother.
20 And he answered and said unto him, Master, all these have I observed from my youth.
21 Then Jesus beholding him loved him, and said unto him, One thing thou lackest: go thy way, sell whatsoever thou hast, and give to the poor, and thou shalt have treasure in heaven: and come, take up the cross, and follow me.
22 And he was sad at that saying, and went away grieved: for he had great possessions.
23 And Jesus looked round about, and saith unto his disciples, How hardly shall they that have riches enter into the kingdom of God!
24 And the disciples were astonished at his words. But Jesus answereth again, and saith unto them, Children, how hard is it for them that trust in riches to enter into the kingdom of God!
25 It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle, than for a rich man to enter into the kingdom of God. (Matthew 10:17-25 KJV)
So, I let go of control of my life, and gave it to God. And it hasn’t been the same ever since. And every wish I had dreamed of regarding how I wished my life would be has been humbly coming true.
Well, I gotta get back to some work here at home. Lots to do today, lots of prayers to be said. Lots of praises to our Almighty for all He has given me. One of the things I find humorous, is that in 1 Corinthians 11, it talks about women covering their head when talking to God. Well, I talk to God ALL DAY, so I guess I need to have my head covered all day! HA!
Okay, so yeah, I did say I was going to be blogging more regularly…BACK IN SEPTEMBER…so, obviously, I need to take a step back from promising things I am not 100% sure of. But we’re here now, so hey! What’s happening????
Lots has happened, I really don’t even know where to begin. I celebrated my year being saved on November 18th, 2017 and was able to go to church the next morning and just worship till my hearts content; absolutely smitten with God in such a way I became incredible emotional during the FIRST SONG. Yeahhhh…doesn’t take much anymore to bring on the old briny tears. Think about it: Have you ever been in love with anyone? Or anything? Like something takes your breath away SO much you cannot help by release the endorphins because it’s just too dang much for your physical body to hold onto anymore. That’s how I feel about Jesus. I know, it sounds weird. And it’s not like in a romantic (obviously) way that I feel for my husband. No, this is different. I understand what unconditional love is, because you realize that NOTHING He can or cannot do will ever sway your love for Him. That’s how I feel.
Unfortunately, my love for my God came with a big cost. People who were a part of my journey walked out of my life so fast I couldn’t even blink fast enough. People don’t like hearing about an absolute. No, in today’s society, the idea of “whatever” is more apropos than having a solid foundation of 1 thing. In a world where New Age philosophies are gaining popularity every second, one usually doesn’t even notice how these philosophies have infiltrated almost every mainstream religion. And no, I am not condemning anyone here for living this life or believing these things. I was there for over 10 years, and if there was anything that upset me more, was judgement over my beliefs. Just because I no longer adhere to these principals, does not mean I am pointing my finger at others who do. And sure, do I get criticized for not pointing my finger and trying to “save” those people? Every time. In fact, it’s one of the very reasons why I haven’t blogged here. I found it emotionally exhausting trying to placate every single thing I was posting on social media, knowing full well there were some waiting on the edge of their seats for me to say something that contradicts their own ideas of anything. Some times it wasn’t even about religion. I realized that my life quickly was being looked upon the social media population with a microscope, and I’ll admit I had difficulty trying to keep a smile on my face every day. Look, I understand that I cannot make everyone happy, but it came to a point where one had to throw their hands up in defeat, realizing you couldn’t make ANYONE happy. That has always been a point of weakness for me. I admit that. In all my years of spiritual and emotional growth, I am still incredibly naive in areas of others’ opinions of me. Here’s the thing: I’m not here to “save” anyone. That’s an intimate relationship with the divine, and my ego learned very quickly only I can save myself. Everyone is on their own when making any final agreement with our Creator. But if I want to be a beacon of light and help those who ask for it, in the words of George Costanza, I’ll do it every day of the week and twice on Sunday.
But, over the last 3 weeks, when my life changed quickly and drastically, I found out that it cannot matter anymore. That no matter how much you try, it is really a battle that never can be won in the flesh. Something I learned over this last year: Don’t hate the person. You’re not fighting the person in front of you; you are fighting with an evil entity who is inside of them, creating a sort of chaos in their mind and body, allowing them to hate, ridicule and belittle anything and anyone for any reason. You can be the most faithful servant to God, but you are still human. And when living on this 3 dimensional planet, where evil and demonic forces are everywhere, waiting to pounce on anything that shows weakness, it becomes a never ending saga of “how can I get around it next time”. And that’s just suicide, folks.
Did you know that in the first prayer Jesus taught everyone, the Our Father? Well, the ending part of the prayer, most say, “But deliver us from evil”, is actually INCORRECT. No, the correct version at the end of this prayer actually says, “But deliver us from the evil one.”
THE EVIL ONE.
We are dealing with evil principalities on the other side who want nothing more than to see us fail and live in darkness and shame. They thrive on it. Where do you think the old saying, “When it rains, it pours” comes from? When weakness is found, the feed on it until they are full, and sadly, their hunger for your demise is never ending.
In the last 3 weeks, I have had a lot of time to think about life. About MY life, and the people within this life I hold dear. My husband and sons, my adult puppy, my parents, sister, extended family and all my friends…They are the ones that matter. Nothing and NO ONE ELSE. (Is it weird my brain went right to a Metallica song? All of a sudden I was hearing James Hetfield in his low voice singing, “No, nothing else matters….” – That’s what I get for being married to a metal head).
Tomorrow is my 44th birthday. WOOHOO!!!!! Grab the balloons and confetti! This girl is another year older! This last trip around the sun was definitely interesting. So many high highs, along with just as many low lows. But, the truth is, I’m still standing right here, with a big old smile on my face. Sure, my smile looks a little more weathered, as the fine lines and little wrinkles here and there are starting to pop up in odd places, but I haven’t felt this peaceful in years. Seriously! I would love to tell you my secret, but right now, it’s not the time. (But I promise I will, eventually!)
(between the hundreds of cowlicks, the wrinkles on my forehead from years of scowling, and all that rosacea on that nose, my 44th is coming in full swinging!)
I WILL, though, tell you what I am doing NOW. I’ve been a busy gal, working on a few businesses. I am a Presenter for Younique now, as well as a Founding Consultant for EllaTina (a legging and soon-to-be more clothing styles company), a Consultant for Nutrasail, and of course we cannot forget the good old Bohemian Hobbit Apothecary .
I am currently in the process of laying out the 2018 Gardens. Due to my faith change, the name of our homestead has changed as well. I am thinking of calling it Morning Glory Homestead, as we are inundated with Morning Glories EVERYWHERE! Some people, as well as lots of landscapers, say that they are this invasive weed, but this gal right here think they are just so beautiful! So, I chose to just trellis them up, rather than remove them. The Purpledead Nettles, on the other hand, are something that make me want to stick pins in my eyes.
I am going to be working 3 different types of gardening this year: Garden of Eden, Hugleculture, and Core gardening. Each one has it’s place in Permaculture, but all with a different spin to it. So, different areas of my property will house one of those ways. 2017 Garden was definitely more of a success than 2016, as we ended up with tomatoes and peppers galore! And the herbs came back with a vengeance, by end of July, the gardens looked lovely!
(just some of the garden in its prime)
And lucky for me, this gal gets to continue, or better yet, start her gardening earlier than even this coming year! Sitting in a box, is my little side greenhouse that will connect to our back doors. I cannot even tell you how excited I am about this new journey with my gardening, and so happy my Dad is going to help me put it together! Keep an eye out for the finished product in January!
And finally, we are hoping this coming spring we will finally get our kitchen window put in. Having no windows in our kitchen makes it dark and rather gloomy. And I need light to keep me happy.
So, I am prepared to have a lovely Christmas and New Year with family and my closest of friends, and I really am just so excited for what 2018 is going to bring. I feel that 2018 will be a year of incredible blessings! I truly believe that if I did not have the ONE thing in my life, I would not be where I am right now.
The Resurrected Christ
And I truly believe that He is up in my gardens in Heaven right now, tending to everything, waiting for my time to come up there and be with Him. Over the last 6 months, I’ve been given visions through dreams of what it’s like up there. I’d like to say that what I saw in my dreams were real. Why?
Faith, my friends. Faith.
My next blog will talk about what I saw up there. Until then, have a very Merry Christmas and a Happy Happy 2018!!!!
Hi ya’ll! So glad to be FINALLY sitting down at my computer on this Sunday afternoon. I really am just looking forward to a weekend where nothing needs to be clean, nothing needs to be laundered, nothing needs to be maintained, so I am able to devote my time to you and this website. I have found myself to be inundated with watching and reading other wonderful websites that have truly caught my heart, but there has always been something deep within me that says, “oh, isn’t there a PERFECT website out there for me?”
Well, I am a writer. And I have been the owner of quite a few websites over the years. But this is different. This is a road I have NEVER been on before. What happens is that the moment I try to figure out what to write, two things usually occur. Right now, I have two things I DESPERATELY want to do.
Take a nap or write this post.
Well, that’s a problem of all problems, I tell you. If I put myself down for a nap (yes, even at 43, sometimes I have to treat myself like a toddler that is in line for a much-needed nap), then I’ll lay there thinking about this post. Sitting here as I am typing this, my brain is thinking, “I can’t even imagine how cool my goose-down pillow is right now, and how perfect it would feel under my head”. Yup. Mid-forties, still can’t make a decision to save my soul. I have found that is one of me and my husband’s biggest arguments, because he will ask me a question, and I have absolutely NO idea how to answer. That’s something I definitely want to work on and make better in my life.
I went from living a rather boisterous, radical life to realizing my true happiness was through modesty, humility, and an overall submission to the will of God on how he views my life and how I should be living it right now.
And look, I cannot forget my past, and I’m not saying I’m going to be judging how women live their life. This is just a personal journey that I am going through on my own here. I just ask for those still not understanding my journey to just respect it from afar if you have to. I’m not here to fight and right now I’m not strong enough to debate. My life is still incredibly emotional that debating others who proactively seek me out, friend or foe, is too much right now, and I just ask you all to respect what’s I’m going through.
Moving on from that, I do want to talk about something that has seemed to have taken off into the curious minds of those around me.
WHAT’S WITH THE SCARVES ON YOUR HEAD?
I know, I know. It’s an adjustment to me as well.
In fact, everything about this new path has been a mega-adjustment. Like a child learning how to walk, living a completely different way needs to be handled delicately. Although I am a 43 year old woman of sound-mind, spiritually, I am only a few months old. I’m doing things that honestly I NEVER in my life thought I’d ever do. My progressive, liberal views have changed drastically, and sometimes it’s difficult for me to walk forward on certain tasks. Head covering included.
(me with all my new ways to head cover)
In fact, I am going on my 3rd week of covering full time. I was paranoid at the fact I would be called out for it. But, I work for a great company that thrives on diversity, and 95% of the people who I’ve encountered have been incredibly supportive. So much, that my company has asked me to be a speaker for a Christian event coming up in October that will allow me to discuss my journey and testimony, including the promise to head cover. Sure, there were a few that were less-than-courteous, and I just chalk that up to ignorance. Not in the sense they were mean, no, just uneducated on that particular circumstance.
What has been even more amazing, is the fact that with this head covering movement I started in my own little world, it also helped me make a decision in my life. To enforce my decision, my amazing Mom said to me earlier today, (sweetie, you need to sit down and carve out your “what makes me happiest” you want in your life)….And boy is she RIGHT ON THE MONEY! Last week the enemy was hitting me left and right, even with saying the Warrior prayer, Satan and his strongholds were attacking me everywhere they could hit me. This is an opportune time to get stronger! And with the renewed vigor in my body, mind and spirit, I’m ready to tackle on the one thing I DO believe have been keeping me from doing my dream!
So, that’s what’s going on right now. I want to try to get a post out at least once a week. And the more I become comfortable and strong in my body, my faith and my love not just for God, but for myself, I will have more to contribute to this movement.